Meatheads Galore

The gym is one of my favorite places to play sociologist. As a timid member of the male gender, I am fascinated by the machismo culture that is accepted and promoted at the gym. I will, in screenplay format, share my latest hyper-masculine observation at Life Time Fitness.

The following is based on a true story.

Meatheads Galore 

Int. - Weight Room.
BEVIS and his pal, BUTTHEAD, are working out at a high end fitness center in their neighborhood. The weight room is stuffed with people as the two are working out during peak hours. They are using dumbbells and spotting each other. After what seems to be an especially difficult set, Bevis slams the dumbbell onto the floor and the noise of the weight echoes through the room.

BEVIS 

Woo! Dude, I've bee going really fucking hard on arm day lately. Plus, I got this new shit and it's making me jacked.

BUTTHEAD 

Fuck-yeah man. I was like 160 like three months ago. Now I'm like 168 and cut.

Both Bevis and Butthead are speaking at an unnecessarily excessive volume and occupying too much space. Other members of the gym turn to look at Bevis and Butthead as they have, against their will, eavesdropped on Bevis and Butthead's conversation. Butthead now takes the dumbbell into his possession and begins his set of bicep curls. Meanwhile, Bevis takes an enormous swig of the concoction he has in his mixing bottle while flexing and looking out the corner of his eyes to the mirror in front of him. Bevis exhales when he finishes drinking and wipes his mouth with his forearm. Bevis then adjusts his focus to Butthead.

BEVIS 

Don't quit on me. Give me three more reps, mother fucker! Come on!

Butthead, in manly fashion, grunts as he wills three more reps. At the conclusion of his third rep, Butthead drops the dumbbell, again letting out cacophonous echo throughout the room. As Butthead jumps out of his seat, he lets out a tremendous bellow.

BUTTHEAD 

Fuck-yeah, dude. Last time I got with Jenny she was loving the guns.

The end.